


love is love

by andromedagalaxy



Series: Philkas College Verse [26]
Category: Eyewitness (US TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-28
Updated: 2017-06-28
Packaged: 2018-11-20 11:26:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11334753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andromedagalaxy/pseuds/andromedagalaxy
Summary: All the floats are beautiful. He’s surprised to see so many church groups marching, but it makes him happy to see them here. Lukas and Philip talk to a bunch of people, so many couples, and after a while Lukas stops being nervous. He watches Philip and is so enamored with him, how incredible he is, and a lot of people tease him for the lovey dovey look on his face. But he just smiles, because that’s another thing he’s proud of. The enormity of his love for Philip, how it lives in his eyes all the time. He wants people to know. He kisses Philip’s hand and his heart swells when Philip looks over his shoulder, grinning at him. He’s so happy here. Which makes Lukas love it even more.They keep walking through the crowd and Lukas tries to work Philip’s camera while he’s on the phone with Helen, but he can barely do it with two hands, let alone one. He takes a lopsided photo of Philip, squinting against the sun. There’s still sunscreen on his nose from when Lukas put it on him, but Lukas thinks he looks cute, so he doesn’t say anything.





	love is love

Lukas lounges on the couch and stretches his legs out until his knee cracks. He can still see the rainbow flag across the street billowing out their neighbor’s window and he sighs, smiling to himself. 

Spring semester was a breeze compared to their fall semester, though they only had two classes together this time around. Philip takes and develops more photos every day, and he joined a photography club that monopolizes way too much of his time, Lukas decided after twelve hours apart. More and more people have been getting interested in Philip’s work, and someone actually hired him to take pictures of their baby shower. Lukas went with him and after a brief freakout in the hallway, Philip took some of the best pictures Lukas has ever seen him take. They were gorgeous and he got a hundred bucks out of it, but Lukas has still yet to convince him to actually try to start taking freelance pictures for events. But he’s gonna keep trying.

They visited home more and Lukas practiced on his bike when he was in Tivoli, always with Philip pressed up close against his back. It felt strange when they were there, like they were catching a bit of the past and holding it between their fingers—they always have more nightmares when they’re there, but Lukas is grateful they never have to worry about not sleeping in the same bed.

They escaped midterms with all A’s, and finals with A’s and B’s and one B-, thanks to Philip’s chemistry class, and they celebrated finishing their first year of college with Angela, some gourmet New York pizza, and the puppies. Which made Philip want a dog even more. Which made Lukas start thinking really hard about the future. 

For now, it’s the beginning of their summer and the beginning of June, which means that Philip is fluttering around the apartment, getting ready for the Pride Parade. He’s been anticipating it ever since he found out it was going right by their apartment, and in the beginning he wasn’t sure if Lukas would go with him. But they’re long past the point of being afraid to ask things like that, and when Philip presented the question Lukas, of course, said he’d be going with him.

He never really thought twice about it. It did make him a little nervous, he admitted it to himself and Philip, but he is proud of who he is, and he’s especially proud of their relationship. Philip is the most gorgeous little thing on the face of the earth, especially when he’s happy, and Lukas wants to be there with him for this. He wants people to know that such a radiant person could love him.

He’s pretty proud of himself, too.

He’s wearing a white shirt, the chain Philip gave him, and jeans, nothing fancy, but he has a rainbow sweatband on his head, and he pushes it up a little higher on his forehead. He looks up when he sees Philip pass by again—Philip has a rainbow painted delicately on his cheek that he did himself, a Pride shirt, jeans and colorful converses. 

“Baby,” Lukas says, watching him walk over to the fridge and take out two water bottles. “You look really, really cute.”

Philip beams over at him, grinning. “You too,” he says. “You still okay with this? We don’t have to do anything crazy like dance half naked on a float or anything.”

Lukas scoffs at him. “You don’t know my plans.”

Philip smiles even wider and Lukas is feeling that feeling again, like he’s looking into the sun. He’s never felt so familiar with something before, not even his own father. When he looks at Philip love washes over him, deep and overwhelming and powerful. Sometimes Lukas doesn’t know how he keeps his hands off him. 

“C’mere,” Lukas says, holding his hand out.

Philip walks over and as soon as he can Lukas grabs him, pulling him down on top of him. Philip laughs and settles on top of him, pressing his face into Lukas’s neck.

“We’re gonna have fun,” Lukas says, wrapping his arms tight around him. 

“I just don’t want you to be uncomfortable,” Philip whispers, like he’s admitting some kind of secret. “I want you to tell me if you are.”

“I will,” Lukas says, cupping the back of Philip’s head and combing through his hair. “But I’m not gonna be. I’m gonna be with you. I’m always comfortable when you’re there. We could be in…” He tries to think of some kind of outrageous situation where he’d be uncomfortable despite being with Philip, but his mind goes blank. 

“Um, please, acting as if you can’t think of anything,” Philip says, poking him in the stomach. “We could get kidnapped again, we could be in a pool of shit, we could be on jury duty, we could—”

“Fine,” Lukas says, shuddering at _kidnapped again_. “But I won’t be uncomfortable here. It’s a parade. It’s gonna be fun. And uh, I think I’m gonna be among kindred spirits. Because contrary to past Lukas’s belief, I’m pretty goddamn gay.”

Philip sits up, grinning at him. “Well, let’s go celebrate gay pride, shall we?”

Lukas tips his chin up, nodding, and Philip gives him the kiss he was looking for.

~

It doesn’t take them long to find the parade, and for a little while, Lukas doesn’t feel like he fits in. He doesn’t think he’s dressed up enough, and he thinks he may have gotten lost amongst all the people and smiling faces if he wasn’t holding Philip’s hand. And it seems like Philip knows he needs to keep holding onto him because he takes all his photos one-handed, tugging Lukas closer. There are so many rainbow flags everywhere, a big rainbow bus chugging down the street. It’s beautiful.

Philip pulls him through the crowd until they’re close to the barrier. Everyone seems so happy, a group around them singing and dancing with each other, and Philip pulls him flush against his side. Lukas lets go of his hand and wraps an arm around his waist, absentmindedly fingering his belt loop. A drag queen with big pink hair walks up to Lukas from the street, smiling softly at him.

“You alright, sweetie?” she asks him. 

Lukas can feel his cheeks going red and he can see Philip grinning at him out of the corner of his eye. “I’m fine,” he says, stuttering out a nod, and Philip laughs a little bit next to him.

“Yes you are,” she says, her purple lipstick glittering in the sun. Her eyes fall on Philip from under long lashes. “This your other half?”

“That’s him,” Lukas says, and he feels like an idiot because he can’t keep his voice from wavering. But he tugs Philip closer and smiles as Philip leans his head on his shoulder. 

“Happy Pride,” Philip says. “You look amazing.”

“Thank you, little sweetheart,” she says, beaming at both of them. She reaches into her bag and pulls out two beaded necklaces, handing them over. “You two have a fabulous day, kiss each other as much as you feel like, you hear me?”

“Oh, we will,” Lukas says, without thinking. He feels Philip leaning his head back and Lukas leans down to kiss him. 

“There we go,” the drag queen says, skipping back out into the street to follow her float. 

A few people are patting Lukas on the back, cheering, and when he pulls away from Philip he sees that he’s started some kind of kissing wave, and he laughs a little breathlessly. He’s never, ever had anybody cheer for him just because he kissed Philip, and he kinda likes the way it feels. He puts his new necklace on and Philip follows suit, and Lukas can’t help it and kisses him again. More people cheer and they kiss too, waving their flags. 

“They’re cheering when people kiss,” Lukas says, grinning when it happens again a few feet away from them. 

“Nice, huh?” Philip asks. He’s so happy and it looks like he’s glowing. Goddamnit, he’s so beautiful, Lukas can barely stand it.

“Yeah,” Lukas says. “Nice.”

~

All the floats are beautiful. He’s surprised to see so many church groups marching, but it makes him happy to see them here. Lukas and Philip talk to a bunch of people, so many couples, and after a while Lukas stops being nervous. He watches Philip and is so enamored with him, how incredible he is, and a lot of people tease him for the lovey dovey look on his face. But he just smiles, because that’s another thing he’s proud of. The enormity of his love for Philip, how it lives in his eyes all the time. He wants people to know. He kisses Philip’s hand and his heart swells when Philip looks over his shoulder, grinning at him. He’s so happy here. Which makes Lukas love it even more.

They keep walking through the crowd and Lukas tries to work Philip’s camera while he’s on the phone with Helen, but he can barely do it with two hands, let alone one. He takes a lopsided photo of Philip, squinting against the sun. There’s still sunscreen on his nose from when Lukas put it on him, but Lukas thinks he looks cute, so he doesn’t say anything.

“I’m gonna cut it like, tomorrow,” Philip says, and Lukas knows Helen is asking about his hair again. He hasn’t gotten it cut in a little while, and it’s not even that much longer than it usually is, just curling a bit into his eyes. But Lukas likes it. He loves Philip’s hair. 

Philip looks over his shoulder and shakes his head at Lukas, rolling his eyes. “Promise. I do not look like a caveman. Right Lukas?” He holds out the phone in Lukas’s direction.

“Looks just as cute as ever, Helen!” Lukas yells.

Philip grins, squeezing his hand. “Yeah,” he says. “He’s having fun. It’s nice, it’s really—yeah, Lukas put it on me like ten minutes ago. I’m not gonna burn.”

Lukas grins, and nods at an older man in a bright red shirt, holding hands with another man around his same age. 

“Okay, I gotta go,” Philip says. “We’re walking and the barricades look like they’re about to get wonky.”

“Wonky, babe?” Lukas asks, letting the camera drop down onto his chest. He reaches out and grips Philip’s waist with his free hand. “Wonky. Let me look up at these wonky barricades.”

“Helen I have to go so I can punch Lukas in the face. Okay. Okay, I love you too. Bye.” He slips his phone into his pocket and yanks Lukas towards him, the two of them giggling when Lukas stumbles forward until they’re nose to nose.

“Hey, hey, you can’t punch your boyfriend in the middle of Pride,” Lukas says, grinning and glancing down at Philip’s mouth. “That has to be a rule or something.”

“Kiss me for luck getting us through these _wonky_ barricades,” Philip says.

“Okay, but only for luck,” Lukas says, smashing their mouths together. He pulls away a moment later and grins down at him.

“You two are real cute,” a spiky-haired girl next to them says. “You need a flag.”

“Oh,” Philip says, taking it from her. He shakes it out a little bit and sees how large it is. He grins up at her, nodding. “Thank you very much!”

“Have fun,” she says, grinning back and forth at the two of them before she continues on her way.

“Here,” Lukas says, reaching for it. “Lemme put it on my shoulder for now so I can be more rainbow-y. And you need to focus on the wonky barricades, you can’t have a flag.”

Philip laughs, pointing at him and shaking his head. “I’m gonna kill you.”

~

Lukas gives Philip his camera back, putting it over his head. They maneuver through the barricades which Lukas will admit, silently and in his head, are a little wonky. They follow alongside a big float covered in flowers, a bunch of dancers strutting behind it. Philip takes a million pictures of them and they eat it up, waving at him and throwing flowers in his direction. 

Before they know it there’s a big crowd of people following the dancers and then Lukas realizes that they’re not behind the barricades anymore, and for a while they’re walking alongside the sidewalk, but then they’re pulled into the crowd out in the middle of the street.

Lukas looks around. “Uh—”

“We’re in the parade now,” Philip says, turning and grinning at him. 

“We are walking in the parade,” Lukas says, laughing.

“You okay with that?” Philip says, his eyes wide.

“Yeah,” Lukas says, swinging their hands back and forth between them. He looks around at all the flags, hears the music in the air, people clapping and singing. He doesn’t know how the hell they managed to get into the street but he really feels like a part of it now. He spreads the flag out and holds it up above his head. 

Philip grins, pushing forward a little bit and walking backwards, taking a couple pictures of Lukas. When he pulls back and looks at him, Lukas is sure he sees Philip’s eyes shining a little bit.

“Come back here, baby,” Lukas says, reaching out for his hand. 

“Yeah,” Philip says, weaving their fingers together. “I want everybody to know I’m with you.”

Lukas leans down and kisses him again.

~

“So yeah, that’s his heartbeat,” Lukas says, finishing up his story and nodding down at the tattoo on his wrist. “He’s got a matching one.”

The girl he’s speaking to looks touched, pressing her lips together and putting her hand over her heart. “You two are precious,” she says. 

“Thanks,” he says, grinning. 

Lukas doesn’t know how many hours have gone by but he knows they’re on a float now with about sixteen other people, all couples, and most of them, including Philip and Lukas, are covered in body paint. Lukas doesn’t remember when he lost his shirt, but so many other guys are shirtless too and he doesn’t feel like he looks stupid. All the music they’re playing is really good, and Lukas dances towards Philip, tugging him forward by the hips. 

“You look like you’re making friends,” Philip says, beaming at him.

“Yeah, everybody’s nice,” Lukas says, looking around. He feels really good, hopping from foot to foot, and kissing Philip’s temple. “I can’t believe you brought a flask full of vodka and didn’t say anything,” Lukas whispers, into his ear. 

“Hush, tipsy,” Philip says, leaning back into him. “No more for you.”

“Alright, alright,” Lukas says, laughing. He walks over to the tub of paint again and tips his hands in, giggling when he exchanges a look with one of the taller girls who has been continually covering her girlfriend in paint. 

“Lukas,” Philip laughs, when he sees Lukas coming at him. He already has paint all over his shirt, some in his hair, red and gold streaks across his cheek. They’d been repeatedly assured it wouldn’t stain and isn’t toxic, so Lukas has been covering the two of them in it because he really likes the way it looks. Especially on Philip.

“What?” Lukas asks, waving to the crowd when they turn a corner. They’ve got a bucket of lei’s on this float and he tosses them out to people periodically, though most of them as of late have been covered in paint, too.

“How much paint do you want to cover me in?” Philip laughs, holding out his hands to shield himself. 

“A lot,” Lukas says, walking over and smearing his hands up Philip’s neck. “Is that a problem?”

Philip hums to himself, sighing into his current predicament, reaching up and grabbing Lukas’s wrists. “No, but it’s gonna be equal footing here,” he says. He tugs Lukas over to the tub of paint and dips his hand in the blue. He straightens up, dragging it across Lukas’s bare chest. 

Lukas looks down at it. “I’m gonna get that tattooed,” he says, looking back up and meeting Philip’s eyes. “So I’ll always have your hand on me.”

Philip shakes his head but he’s smiling, arching up and kissing Lukas. 

Lukas holds him when they pull away, and can feel Philip tangling his paint covered hands in Lukas’s hair. He snorts, shaking his head, and when he looks up he sees they’re passing by the Stonewall Inn. He knows about the riots, remembers reading about them in school. He knows what they meant, what they led to, and he can’t help but stare at the building. It’s adorned with rainbow flags, so many that he can’t even count them, and there’s a large group of people dancing right in front of it.

“You don’t have to go quiet, honey,” a man says, from behind him. “They fought for us to be out here, for us to be loud. For you to kiss your little cutie there.”

Lukas turns around and nods at him, smiling softly. He turns back to Philip and brushes some of the hair away from his face. “Yeah, little cutie,” he says. “You look like you need another kiss.”

“I pretty much always do,” Philip says, laughing. 

~

A little bit more time goes by, which consists of more kissing, more paint, more singing and dancing, and about a hundred free condoms, which Philip takes in droves. Lukas knows they’ve stopped using them but he figures they’ll come in handy somehow, and Philip seems especially pleased that some of them are glow in the dark. They’re eventually helped off the float and they walk home, Lukas’s arm thrown around Philip’s shoulders, his shirt, the flag and Philip’s camera stowed away in the backpack. Lukas is so happy and there’s a strange sense of relief, too. He can’t exactly explain it, but he knows he feels free. 

As soon as they get inside the apartment and push the door closed, Philip drops his bag, kicking off his shoes and tugging Lukas towards their bedroom. They bypass the bed and move into the bathroom, and Philip backs up until he hits the wall and pulls Lukas flush against him. 

“I’m so proud of you,” Philip says, pulling his own shirt over his head. They press their bare chests together and Philip palms the back of Lukas’s neck, nuzzling his nose against Lukas’s. “I’m so proud of you, Lukas.”

Lukas doesn’t even really know why but hearing Philip say it makes his heart stutter, and he kisses him softly. He leans back and smudges red paint across Philip’s lips, watches him lean into his hand and hold it there against his cheek. 

Lukas feels dizzy looking at him and he presses their bodies together, slipping his free hand around Philip’s waist and pressing it to the small of his back. Lukas pushes against him slightly and hears Philip gasp. 

Philip is gorgeous. A perfect person in every way and Lukas doesn’t get it, doesn’t get why Philip is here, why he stayed in the beginning, after all the hell that Lukas put him through. In times like these Lukas feels like he doesn’t deserve him, that Philip could do so much better, and Lukas wants to be everything he wants, everything he needs.

“I love you,” Lukas whispers, moving against him again. “I love, I love—I’m so—God, I was happy to be there with you today—”

Philip tugs at Lukas’s pants, undoing the button. Lukas steps out of his shoes, reaches down and undoes his zipper, trying to shimmy until his jeans fall down his hips. Philip laughs, leaning in and pushing them down the rest of the way, kissing Lukas’s neck all the while. “I love you,” Philip whispers against his throat. “God, I want you.”

Lukas’s stomach jumps and he gets Philip’s pants off too, both of them kicking their clothes away and nearly falling in the process. Lukas doesn’t know what he wants, can’t tell what Philip wants either, just closeness. It feels almost as necessary as breathing. He loves the way Philip looks in his boxer-briefs, that stark swatch of black against his skin, and it’s goddamn tantalizing. Lukas hitches one of Philip’s legs up around his hip and thrusts against him.

“Lukas,” Philip gasps. 

“Philip,” Lukas groans, holding his leg up and moving fast against him, their cocks sliding together through their underwear. 

“You looked so good on that—that float,” Philip says, smiling and breathing hard through his mouth. 

Lukas wants to touch him all over but he presses harder, scratching a little bit at the small of Philip’s back. 

Philip moans and tangles his hand in Lukas’s hair, the other working around to clutch at his waist. “So beautiful, sugar, all mine—”

“All yours,” Lukas says, pressing his mouth to Philip’s cheek. “I’m yours, yours, never—never let me go—”

“Never, never,” Philip chants, his hand snaking down to squeeze Lukas’s ass. “You’re goddamn crazy if you think—think I could—”

Lukas trembles, the friction between them too good, sparking up in his veins and driving him insane. He’s of one mind, can’t move an inch from Philip, not an inch, and he drives forward in a particularly good thrust, their moans mingling against the tile walls. He can feel velvet static tracing its way up his legs and growing heavy in the place where the heat is building between them. Lukas holds Philip’s leg tighter and hikes it up a little higher, and Philip arches deliciously against him.

“Body paint was good,” Philip whispers, his breath coming fast. “So—ah, ah—fuck, so good, you look so good.”

Lukas pulls back a little so they’re nose to nose again, and he catches sight of the red smeared across Philip’s lips. He groans, gasping, and smashes their mouths together. The kiss breaks and they just breathe into each other’s skin, like they’d both die if they didn’t keep on doing this. The stutter of Lukas’s hips gets sloppy and he can feel how hard Philip is, how wet, leaking through the material of his boxer-briefs. Philip’s breath hitches and his head falls forward onto Lukas’s shoulder, his nails digging into Lukas’s neck as he comes. Lukas loves it when Philip writhes in his arms, loves knowing he’s taken him apart like this. He thrusts a couple more times, his legs so wobbly that it feels like they’re gonna give out from underneath him, and his release finds him before he expects it to. 

“Fuck, Philip, Philip,” Lukas moans, shaking, turning his face into Philip’s hair. He squeezes his eyes shut and keeps grinding, a few aborted movements before he wilts into Philip’s arms.

Philip laughs breathlessly, clutching Lukas closer. “I fucking love it when we do that. We should…we should do it more often.”

Lukas kisses Philip’s cheek, slowly letting his leg down. “Makes me feel extra fucking desperate for you when we can’t even get naked all the way.”

“Yeah,” Philip says, squeezing his ass again and making Lukas gasp. “That’s why I like it.”

“Now we need a shower,” Lukas says, nudging into Philip’s neck. He huffs a little bit, sighing. “I like the paint on you.”

“Mmm, we’re gonna need to invest in some of our own,” Philip says. He kisses Lukas’s temple over and over, running his hands through his hair. “I meant it when I said I was proud of you.”

“You don’t need to be proud of me,” Lukas says, kissing his neck. “I didn’t do—”

“Yes,” Philip says, taking Lukas’s face in his hands so he’ll look him in the eye. “You did do something. Lukas, you in junior year of high school would have never, ever been able to do what you did today. You’ve come so far and I’m so, so proud of you, babe.”

Lukas smiles softly, pressing their foreheads together. He knows it’s all due to Philip. Nearly losing him, making love to him, nearly losing him again. Wanting to soothe all his pain after it was over. Every step in his relationship with Philip made him want to be more himself, made him dredge up all the feelings he’d buried because Philip needed him, all of him, who he really was. Lukas never would have gotten to this point if it wasn’t for Philip. “Thank you,” he whispers, pressing their mouths together. 

Philip shakes his head but Lukas nods, chewing on his lower lip. 

Lukas tries to keep his heart from rattling, and he kisses Philip again. “I don’t know why Helen doesn’t like your hair like this,” Lukas says. “I think you look sexy.”

Philip snorts. “You’d think I looked sexy if I was covered in trash,” he says.

“Yeah, I would,” Lukas says, grinning. 

“Come on,” Philip says, peeling himself off the wall and taking Lukas’s hand. “Shower.”

Lukas takes off his boxer-briefs and looks at Philip expectantly. “You think, uh—there will be any more events before the end of Pride Month?”

Philip smiles beautifully, pulling him closer. “Definitely,” he says, stepping out of his own underwear.

Lukas nods, tries not to look as excited as he is. “Awesome,” he says, laughing and stepping into the tub after Philip.

It was an amazing day. And Lukas can’t wait to have more.


End file.
